xiii
Later, when we were still on the settee, I thought I might like that cigarette after all. I lied on my back while she sat between my calves, idly stroking my thigh with her nails as if to excite me back to action again, and she said (now without the accent), “Jane sure knows how to pick the good ones.” I looked up at her, and she smiled sweetly. “I’m opening up to you, Honey. I like you. I like that even when I say that, I can tell you’re not one of the bastards who wants to back out of the deal and try to make me his girlfriend. You’re determined to go through with it, but you’re not angsty or drowning in some eternal sadness that everyone around you has to wade through. You’re peaceful. That’s so yummy.” She licked my ankle to prove it.
I smiled and sighed.
She went back to coursing her still-long nails through my leg hair. “You seem to be enjoying yourself so far.”
“Yes…”
“Is there a ‘but’ I’m hearing in there?”
“No… No ‘but’ at all. It’s just …unusual.”
“What? The costumes?”
“No. They’re fun. And I can understand why they might be good for you too. I don’t pretend that I’m so yummy that I don’t need some spice, eh?”
She laughed.
“I guess- I’m just surprised at how often both you and Jane end up sitting on my face. To put it bluntly.” I chuckled lamely. “It’s not that I mind it – I like it. Actually, it’s kind of my favorite. Is that something in my profile?”
Claire laughed. “No, Honey, it’s in your eyes. Actually, it’s just a good position for me to do my thing without you – whoever I’m with, not you in particular – trying to run the show, or even just talk too much. Unless you express a preference or you’re an hourly, I’d probably end up there anyway when your stamina gave out, but you really seemed to enjoy it, didn’t you? If I hadn’t promised Jane I’d give you back in one piece, I’d probably still be there. It’s my favorite too.” We smirked at each other. “That was a strange question. But just fine. You have to make sure you’re getting what you want out of this.”
She lay down beside me and pulled me to her breast. “So are you excited …being fucked to death?”
God! I wish I’d just held my mouth then; nodded and provoked her up onto my saddle of a face again; swallowed my incessant need to explain, to define, to establish detail. Instead, I was an idiot.
I suckled her nipple – that’s what she wanted – and at least had the sense to consider my answer until she let me go. That gave me enough time to figure out an honest, but suitably cryptic response. She deserved it – the honesty. “Don’t take this the wrong way – I wouldn’t want to change a thing. But the fucking is more of a fringe benefit for me.”
She held me back from her so she could study my face. “But you willed everything to us, so you’re not just a turnaround. There was nothing unusual in your background…” Her eyes hardened. “Are you some kind of fetishist?”
It was my turn to laugh honestly for once. “No.”
“No… I didn’t think you were. Beside, Jane can pick out a fetishist right away. Well, I give up – I’ll bite. What are you looking for in a death by vampire?”